Lifes bollucks

Hi

I know I’ve said I promised to stop complaining about life but its like a house of cards it takes a whole lot of patience, practice and persistence but can be destroyed within a millisecond with no warning or without an explanation.

I’ve come to realise life is a sadistic mash up of bollucks taped together with a fusion of the opposite ends of the tape scale duck tape and masking tape. It is then squished inside a mason jar (which we don’t have here if I’m correct in this dreadful country that I have to live in for a number of more years). It is then blended with a hand blender still in the jar the ball of balls is then compressed down into a layer of flesh at the bottom of the jar in which someone farts in and then fastens the lid and then finally tossed into outer space where it explodes due to lack of atmospheric pressure.

I’m pretty sure I’m not depressed but just frustratingly annoyed and angry about absolutely nothing and everything all in one tiny thought stuck in the back of my mind which is mixed with a song so ironically wrong that it could piss off the most sane, straight minded, focused person who ever lived or will live in the near and distant future; a song so devastatingly stupid I will not mention any of the lyrics or the name (mainly because I don’t actually know the name but still you get the picture). And all this makes me even more angry because when I think or remember one or the other it reminds me of the one not stated before this.

Apart from my suspected mental break down, which my brother predicted yesterday when I said I was having such a great day, my life is going pretty well in general: I’m settling into my new house, the internet is working now, I’ve finished all my tests that I know of, all lost data I wanted and/or needed had been re covered, my dad is getting married which is great because he is so much happier now, I’ve got so many more excuses to get drunk at the wedding at the reception the house warming partyx2 the welcome home party end of year party book burning party camping etc., but as I am writing this I’m realising that the very…very old saying you are not complete if your on your own (or something about saying you need to be with someone) is completely true and I am seeing it more and more.

I’m loosing my confidence and no one is going to find out at school because as always I’ll keep my feelings to my self and on the inside I will metaphorically ripe my face off and tear it in half and half and half and half and half until I have a fist full of face confetti (quote from big bang theory duh!!) which will end up me being in a downward spiral until I lash out and punch something and tear shit apart thread by thread physically and mentally.

And if that wasn’t enough I still can’t stop swearing FFUUCCKK!!

Bye

Thanks for reading, I’m not going to ask for comments because I hate it when people do that and I don’t want to be a hypocrite more than I already am.